Archive for the 'Personal' CategoryPage 2 of 2

The Consummate, Fantastic

Published
by
Bradtastic
on September 11, 2008
in Personal
. 0 Comments
Today marks seven years after a national tragedy… and God bless us, we haven’t been hit again, since. I think far too many people dismiss and overlook the real threat that radical Islam presents to us, America and other free nations and peoples, all over the world. Europe has since been attacked. Many thanks to the brave men and women overseas, putting their lives on the line… and I want to mention that I truly admire the brave men of the 82nd, over in Afghanistan, willing to drive Hummers at a snail’s pace to draw Taliban gunfire to them, and away from the ANA and Afghan nationals.

 

It’s almost my birthday, and while it has been an eventful year, it’s also been a trying, hard and somewhat lackluster year for yours-truly. No longer reeling from my Grandmother’s death on a daily-basis, I look forward to figuring out the first parts of my “true” adult life, and I’ve been fortunate to have the time to think it through.

A lot of analysis, thinking and soul-searching took place before this post; it wasn’t out of anticipation or preparation to blog something big, life just gave me an opportunity and I took it. I’ve made some changes, I’ve been on-and-off sick, still struggling with Stage 2 Hypertension and medication issues… but things aren’t all bad.

I’m lucky. I have great people in my life.

I’ve met some extraordinary women…

I wouldn’t be who I am without ‘em. I think relationships are the greatest treasure, beyond assets, and therefor, this human-connection means so much to me. I let my life play out more publicly and openly than most… I don’t necessarily encourage others to do the same, but I hope it does help to open new lines of communication and encourage honesty.

I love Tennis and I miss playing the game; I’ve been thinking about restringing one of my racquets and hitting against a ball machine just to get the feel of it (and to see if I can). I have a few friends (and a great US Open) to thank for the inspiration to try. I’m playing pool a little bit more, and I’d like to get my own table someday soon. I’ve been open and honest about my politics, drug use, sex life and interests… hoping in-part that this free-communication will make the taboo a little more approachable. I’ve been trading the gadgets and electronics for fountain pen and paper, I regained some hand-control after losing the necessary coordination to perform all of the magic that I’d like… this energy and chaos is fueling my art (mostly inkwork) that I hope will one-day, someday soon, inspire tattoos for my left shoulder and beyond.

 

I don’t have all of the answers, but I like to help. I like to share, even when it’s all random stuff. Everyone has something to complain about… so I offer: get out and do, enjoy, and make life grand. Don’t waste time worrying about the wrong stuff, be thankful for the right stuff, and try to take responsibility for as much of life as possible.

I sleep during the daylight (usually), and I’m awake for the quiet, the clarity of night. The sky is filled with opportunity, and my dreams are as grand and as lively as ever (some people might blame opioid analgesics). Reality binds us all. Control goes to those who take it… and dreamers… well, I can assure you, aren’t so bothered by rising gas prices or burdened by others’ failures. Life is just too good’n’short for that.

I’m excited for this weekend, next, and the 16th. Righ’now ain’t bad!

Stay positive, honest and informed, and you can be ‘tastic, too.

Busy and Sick

Published
by
Bradtastic
on August 11, 2008
in Personal
. 0 Comments

I haven’t been able to set-aside time to blog… in quite a while. I haven’t been able to keep up my usual microblogging pace, either. [I post to my Twitter, and others... I haven't Plurked much, however.]

I have posted a few things on my Tumblr, and will continue to do so, thanks to a neat, free application (for the iPhone) called Lifecast (links to application in iTunes). Using this app, I can very easily and very quickly update my “status” and post on-the-go without the complications of typing login information into a browser window.

Over the past few weeks, I’ve been busy and I’ve been sick… and being ill has only made me more busy—backed-up with countless emails to respond to, correspondence, phone calls to make, appointments to reschedule, art, illustration and writing to complete.

I plan on getting back into the groove, my goal is to increase my overall content output. I don’t get a lot of commenting on my blogs (a bummer, because I write and create to stimulate conversation)… my traffic and pageview totals tell me that people are viewing my sites and content. I’m changing some stuff, too.

My plan is to start vlogging. I’m still figuring out the elements of the “show,” still plotting the “pilot,” and deciding whether to use Seesmic or something else.

One last note:

I’m not going to change my inkblog address (for now). It’s bradchin.com and fairly-easy to remember… and I can’t justify creating a new inkblog site to do the same thing. Perhaps when the content changes or if I modify my style. I’m going to post ink later today.

Apple has released iPhone 2.01 software to address the abysmal battery-life and keyboard lag. My use (thus far) tells me that it’s definitely an improvement (though not quite stable-enough to replace “business” phones). If you want to chat about iPhone stuff (games, applications, functionality, etc), please let me know. I’m planning to write an iPhone software review (what’s hot, what’s not), something simple for friends with less-time to aimlessly browse the net and the iTunes App Store.

I feel very lucky to have some good friends, willing to set-aside time to take care of me during my illness. Long-story short—my medications made me dizzy, nauseated and then sick; I couldn’t get out of bed for a few days, couldn’t drive for a bit, couldn’t leave my condo and couldn’t eat (and hold-down food). I’m pretty sure that I’d still be sick without their support.

Until next time…

Twitter Killed the Blog In Me!

Published
by
Bradtastic
on July 10, 2008
in Personal
. 0 Comments

“What’s up?!”

The inevitable question I used to answer in oh-so-many different ways. It’s not my favorite question; it’s occasionally more of a statement, and I don’t always want to share the answer.

  • With close-friends: it’s a phone call or shared in-person.
  • With other friends: SMS or instant message.
  • To all others: a blog post.

ABOUT ONCE A WEEK, I’D HAVE THE OPPORTUNITY TO SUM-UP AND SHARE my life events, stories and work in the form of a blog post. If I had something particularly-important, I’d even cross-post. I enjoyed the recaps, the feedback, the small, semi-insignificant validation that my life has meaning…

this is all in the past.

Now, the web-elite has microblogging; this simple 140-characters-or-less pleasure is significant mental-masturbation, and the death of the “what’s up.”

The process is not only simple, it’s accessible and always-on. (Well, maybe not Twitter… but some microblog is going to be up!) These services can be updated via instant message and SMS; from a PC or a phone, friends, family and others can follow, get notified and update. Almost anything can warrant a change of status: going to the grocery store, standing in line for a movie or a club, meeting someone famous, having the rare opportunity to hang out with Bradtastic… and with a microblog, the whole world could know it.

Not that the whole world would (or should) care. Regardless, these services are so integrated and “status” is so heavily-prevalent, many people are likely still unaware that they’ve bought-into the trend. Myspace has it, Facebook has it… instant messengers have it.

 
Several times last month, I sat at my computer, staring at a blank page, wondering why I couldn’t blog about my life. I finally realized, and it was so simple: I already had.

Explanation of inevitable pain, thwart destruction

Published
by
Bradtastic
on July 5, 2008
in Personal
. 3 Comments

I sometimes do ugly stuff when I’m feeling sick, and I’m past my limits to tolerate the pain I’m always stuck with… I feel bad about it, but when I can’t sleep, can’t eat and can barely move

life then, just doesn’t feel worth living.

DURING THE BETTER TIMES I’ve experienced some of life’s great pleasures and wonderful experiences. I’ve met some of the most interesting people, some beautiful women with wonderful personalities and gorgeous character. During these times, I’m still in pain but I feel great; I’m in my element and it shows.

I love having people come up to talk to me, a group of women during “girl’s night out,” ignoring the groups of men and the pairs of guys (trying to pretend they’re too cool and not interested.)

The guys gawk and can’t understand how this tall, thin and possibly frail, injured, flawed, long-haired, dark-sunglass wearing Asian is getting all of this attention.

I hear “is he famous?” “I think he’s a model,” “I’ve seen him before, he was with that blonde, remember her?” It’s all in the distance… they’re too-timid to move into my territory. I’m clearly under the social-spotlight, and I enjoy the adoration. I don’t own the club, bar or venue… I do however, during these moments, dominate the ground I stand on and wouldn’t want it any other way.

I want to share these joyous memories

I want to document them; without actually seeing it happen, many can’t understand, appreciate or even believe that these stories are true. During these good times, I’m not looking for sex. I’m not looking for love… I’m finding company, personal connections. I’m entertaining and being entertained, it’s as if my soul is taken care-of by these events. The flattery is a welcome ego-boost; arrogant as I am, I know my flaws and I know my weakness…

I know that at almost any-moment, without warning, I can be stripped of it all and I’ll be sent spiraling-downward,

forced to deal with tremendous pain and the agony of defeat brought-on by my condition—no outside force is ever so irrevocably damaging as the side-effects of narcotics and the withdrawal symptoms from not taking them as the mere-shell of the deeper damage, trauma, mixture of physical and emotional pain…

…slowly seething, swirling in a brew, the eventuality always similar or same: I’m going to hurt. It’s really going to hurt.

I’m lucky to have a few great people, willing to sacrifice so much time and energy to help me feel a bit better. It must be difficult to put-out so much with prior-knowledge that no amount of effort will ever FULLY alleviate my suffering. It can be a disappointment to try so-hard and never fully succeed or accomplish one’s goal… this I know.

This, to the great ones who’ve helped me, and continue to help me through: I love you, so very much. Thank you.

Altered Structure

Published
by
Bradtastic
on June 25, 2008
in Personal
. 0 Comments
That title simply sounds better than “making changes to my blog;” of course, proceeding to explain this very-unimportant and trivial fact negates any possible positive-effects… and maybe that’s why it’s important (to explain).

If you’re reading this at bradtastic.com, you’d see that the site has been stripped of the artwork and imagery, most of the previous articles and entries are gone (or hidden, “same-difference” to the viewer), and that I’m finally using K2. K2 is many things, “good” amongst ‘em, but it’s also more complicated. I hadn’t taken the time to test K2 before making the “upgrade,” so I’m learning as I go. It’s a good thing you’re not paying me to read this blog, huh?

A lot of changes are being made. New content, of course… I also started a new sub-site, spill.bradtastic.com for personal stuff, my friends and me. Probably not too interesting for anyone outside of the circles, though I do find interesting web-apps and beta services (every day). I share links and beta codes, but my microblogs (check the sidebar) and Plurk are probably easier to follow than a tumblelog.

It would help me (greatly) to know who reads this blog and why; I can see the traffic, but instead of comments I get a lot of personal emails. Unfortunately, many of the “game-related” or “art of impression” questions are really, really good; I’d like to share the questions and answers with others, I think it’ll help.

Lastly, thanks for dealing and waiting: it’s not always easy, just being a person, with five-dollars-per-gallon gas and a shoulder disability… often I find that working on my blog is at the top of my want list and at the bottom of my need list. Needs vs wants… sounds. Familiar.